When I was a little girl, I thought being 18 is old and being an adult is kind of far away..and yet now that I’m 22, I wonder whether I have grown any wiser or more mature. And sometimes i wonder, where did all those years go to?

And so I thought I would made a list of things I do or don’t do anymore that shows that I’m getting older..all these are of course, apart from the obvious biological maturity.

I know that I’m getting older when (not really in order):

1. I stopped drinking from my milk bottle.it was white and i hated drinking milk at that time.
2. I can sleep alone without being afraid. and i don’t need anyone to swith off the lights for me.
3. I’m no longer forced to take afternoon nap. In fact, sleep is now a luxury rather than a torture.
4. I can bathe/wash myself. I don’t need ‘no-more-tears’ shampoo either.
5. I stop taking bath with other kids, usually my bro or my cousins or my friends.
6. I no longer kiss my parents goodnight =(
7. I cannot stand straight inside a car anymore.
8. I’m no longer allowed in ‘below 12′ playgrounds/events.
9. I need to bring my wallet when I go out, along with keys, ID, etc.and a whole lot more of other stuffs.
10. I can go out of the house by myself - go traveling without my parents
11. I can go to the doctor by myself, but it’s more like I have to when I’m alone.
12. I can spend my own money anyway I like =)
13. I can drive a car - got my driving license.
14. I’ve been brokenhearted & is falling in love again.
15. I start to think/sound like my mom..oh no.
16. I cooked for myself =)
17. I worked and earn my own money - manage my own bank account
18. I worry about stuffs I would never have worried before when I’m young
19. I no longer worry about some stuffs I worry a lot when I was young
20. I’m no longer in school as a student
21. I have friends who are married/have kids/much older than me/real adults.
22. I’m away from home for long periods of time.

On the other hand, I know I’m still young because/when:

1. I’m still asked for ID to go in to over-18 places.
2. I’m responsible for, at least, myself only.
3. I’m not married yet.
4. I haven’t started working permanently - I’m still studying in Uni.
5. I haven’t own any property like car/house & therefore don’t need to pay for such bills/installments/tax, etc.
6. I haven’t use any anti-aging skin product, etc.
7. My home to come back to is still where my parents & siblings are.
8. My friends my age are still mostly unmarried.
9. I can still blog/think about all these.
10. ?

I hope I can become wiser and more experienced but not complicated, lethargic and pessimistic as i grew older…Be nearer to YOU and be humble.

While researching for my micro-teaching topic some time back, i came across some stuffs on Chinese culture and education..although i admit, it refers to the Chinese culture as in the context of China - looking at myself, i mean, how much would it be applicable to me, you know what i mean..nevertheless, it does provide some interesting insights to our human culture, i mean, as fellow humans, we definitely share some of it…and also, in a practical sense, in case i am assigned to a chinese school in the future..

So here goes:

1. One of the distinctive feature of a traditional Chinese classroom is that it is teacher-centered - the teacher decides which knowledge to be taught and the students accepts and learn.

2. Repetition as a route of understanding in employed. For most Chinese students, repetitive skill development comes first, followed by meaning and interpretation, with repetition being used as the tool for creating meaning.
3. Chinese students constantly review what they have learnt. Confucius’ maxim: by reviewing the old, one learns the new. There’s no limit to things and knowledge. What one has already learnt and understood is old knowledge; but when one has a new understanding of what one has already learnt, it will become new knowledge.
4. There is keen interest in exact understanding of every word, a low tolerance of ambiguity and a focus on discrete points and specific syntactic constructions.
5. In conclusion, Chinese education is dominated by a teacher-centered, book-centered approach, with emphasis on accuracy, repetition, reviewing and rote-memory.

6. The 3 sources of Chinese culture that are often claimed to affect attitude and behaviours of Chinese learners are: i.) collectivism & inter-dependent self/non-individual collectivistic orientation. ii.) socialisation for achievement - success/failure affect whole family/group. iii.)high acceptance of power and authority.

All these are taken from:

Zhenhui Rao (2006). Understanding Chinese Students’ Use of Language Learning Strategies from Cultural and Educatinal Perspectives.

Journal of Multilingual and Multicultural Development, 27 (6), 491-508
As we learn more things, we understand more explicitly things we are only vaguely aware of previously. We found the terms and words, to categories those things in our mind and we get more reason and understanding of why things are the way they are.

I found some online articles that i thought some of you might be interested to read on ..  I don’t know why i can’t create any hyperlink?! So just copy paste the links to your address bar, i’m sure u’ll know what to do la… For my friends from other religions, just so you know, i have no intention to impose anything on anyone ya =) Please respect my views…Peace! ^.^

1. From Pure Love Club :

http://www.chastity.com/chastity/index.php?id=7&cat=How%20Far%20is%20Too%20Far?

2. Men, Women and Tenderness by Edward Sri (2006):

http://catholiceducation.org/articles/sexuality/se0134.htm

3. Chastity before marriage by MarkLowery (1998):

http://catholiceducation.org/articles/sexuality/se0040.html

4. From the Catechism of the Catholic Church (note for casual readers: this is kind of a heavy stuff from the Vatican):

http://www.vatican.va/archive/ENG0015/__P85.HTM

All these I found from the social networking site i joined last year, www.xt3.com,  from the “Library: Ask a priest” section =)

All the best in work, exams and assignments everyone!

Yep! It’s that time again…where some song i liked just get posted here =)

Song Words by Artist / Band : Brandon Heath
Lyrics Title : Give Me Your Eyes
Taken from Album : What If We

Look down from a broken sky
Traced out by the city lights
My world from a mile high
Best seat in the house tonight
Touch down on the cold black top
Hold on for the sudden stop
Breathe in the familiar shock
Of confusion and chaos
All those people going somewhere
Why have I never cared

Chorus:
Give me your eyes for just one second
Give me your eyes so I can see
Everything that I keep missing
Give me your love for humanity
Give me your arms for the broken-hearted
The ones that are far beyond my reach
Give me your heart for the ones forgotten
Give me your eyes so I can see

Step out on a busy street
See a girl and our eyes meet
Does her best to smile at me
To hide what’s underneath
There’s a man just to her right
Black suit and a bright red tie
Too ashamed to tell his wife
He’s out of work, he’s buying time
All those people going somewhere
Why have I never cared

I’ve been here a million times
A couple of million eyes
Just move and pass me by
I swear I never thought that I was wrong
Well, I want a second glance
So give me a second chance
To see the way You’ve seen the people all along

Can’t think of anything that i feel strongly i could blog on..but just felt like i should put in something here. It felt like so long since i last wrote anything, just scared that i’ve lost my voice? (no la~ dun think too much)..n seems like burning the oil is one of the conditions i have to meet to get my thoughts flowing.

I think time really flies - but i enjoy every day, every moment of it. No need too think too much into the future nor look too much back into the past. Just do your best in your current situation, open yourself up to more opportunities of self-improvement, opportunities in life experiences with the people around you and hopefully, when the time comes for whatever it is, you’ll have enough hope, strength and skills to face it, with God’s grace. There’s no ‘Game Over’ in life till you stop breathing anyway.

Just wish that some people enjoy ‘playing’ as i do. Or at least show some enthusiasm for their own sake. It makes me hope that I’ve been thinking too much, maybe. At least, for now i can still escape it, not that i can choose not to. I mean, there’s a limitation to one’s influence on others and an extend where you can make sure they will be alright. And to think you have been spending your whole life with them. What changed, if any? Maybe i should just remember to keep praying, what else can i do from here?

O.K., looks like i’ve strayed a bit…all in all, the fact that nothing much bothers me enough*  to be posted here (or anywhere else) indicates that i’m really blessed - for this I’m reallly grateful… I LOVE YOU (ALL)! Yes, YOU! ;)

*(besides the above, which hopefully, is actually non-existent except at the furthers corner of my mind, dug out for the sake of saying something here and then pushed back again behind to make room for the coming cognitive load of having assignments to do).

P/S: (Li May suspects that she might have extra endorphins (or whatever you call that hormone which makes you happy) released somewhere in her brain at the moment of posting this? or maybe she’s just in love with life and of course, the people in it.. ^u^ ..and also over it as well).

It’s already 2009!

2008 was indeed a memorable year…

There were so many places and events that escape my blog since the last post…Trip to Flemington, Parramatta, Coogee Beach, Bondi Beach, Cherry-Picking at Young, Chatswood, Catholic Chaplaincy Retreat at Wedderburn, Sydney CBD on Boxing Day, X’mas carols at St. Mary, St. Andrews, the gatherings Divine Word Missionaries, X’mas gatherings & masses, family lunch invitations, sleepover at J’s, NYE at Royal Botanical Gardens, YY’s place, etc..

..and all the new (and not so new) people I’ve met…thank you! You have all add colours to my life here in Sydney. I think I’ve met more people (and spend time with them) within this last Dec than the whole year put together? …the people I’ve met in uni, in CASS, in the Uni Village, in church, in SVD, during outings, the kind people I’ve known through others, or even random people sometimes..

To all my current and new friends, please forgive me if I have hurt anyone in anyway - for my selfishness, thoughtlessness, insensitivity, ignorance and all.. and THANK YOU for all the friendships that each of you has given me, for all the good (and occasionally, bad) times we had together, thanks so much..i feel really blessed =)

Although this sounds so general, but really, Thank You Lord for everything…for everything that turned out in 2008.

Thank You Lord

Composed by Dan Burgess

I thank You Lord, for the trials that come my way
In that way I can grow each day, As I let You lead
And I thank You Lord for the patience those trials bring
In that process of growing, I can learn to care

But it goes against the way I am
To put my human nature down
And let the Spirit take control of all I do
For when those trials come
My human nature shouts the thing to do
And God’s soft prompting can be easily ignored.

But I thank You Lord, with each trial I feel inside
That You’re there to help lead and guide me away from wrong
For You promised, Lord, that with every testing
That Your way of escaping’s easier to bear

Yes, I thank You Lord, for the victory that growing brings
In surrender of everything, life is so worthwhile
And I thank You Lord, that when everything’s put in place
Out in front I can see Your face
And it’s there You belong

Exams are coming (but so is the long holidays)

Occasionally I get a bit of over self-conscious-ness.

I think sometimes i always check on myself that i’ll not be self-centered? but isn’t the very act of doing that is being self-centered?

Sometimes i think i think too much…(but that’s what give this blog some of its content ;p)

as always, It’s always when I’m busy that things get done…when i was working, i seldom was late to class as compared too now.

As i was walking home alone, I think I miss my gfs. why not, spending time with them, I don’t have to worry as much as when i go out with guy friends? I want to go somewhere this summer hols. Is it weird if i go alone? why do i want to go so much? do i really want to go actually?

I wonder why i’m different when i’m with different people. Looks like i’m not the only one noticing it. It’s normal i guess..but, if i never get to meet certain people for a certain time frame, where did that me-that-when-i’m-with-you (them) goes to? somewhere…i do miss the ‘me’ when i’m with some people. i only realized it’s existence when it came out, it brought extreme happiness but accompanied by intense frustration at the same time..reminded me of being with my family. Guess you have to take the good and the bad. but some people are always ok..though in short periods. or mayb that’s what makes it ok.i don’t know..myb it’s 2 different things.

I don’t want to get the label PG and i’m 100% sure i’m straight.

kesimpulannya, i think you can either choose a roller coaster ride or a ferris wheel pace…or maybe i can’t choose..depends on who i meet in life.

n why am i not sleeping yet? lecture is less than 4 hours away. crap…(including the lecture). Good morning! Good night!

A song by Toby Mac:

The dream is fading, now I’m staring at the door
I know its over cause my feet have hit the cold floor
Check my reflection, I ain’t feelin what I see
It’s no mystery
Whatever happened to a passion I could live for
What became of the flame that made me feel more
And when did I forget that…

I was made to love you
I was made to find you
I was made just for you
Made to adore you
I was made to love
And be loved by you
You were here before me
You were waiting on me
And you said you’d keep me
Never would you leave me I was made to love
and be loved by you

The dream’s alive with my eyes opened wide
Back in the ring you’ve got me swinging for the grand prize
I feel the haters spittin vapors on my dreams
But I still believe
I’m reachin out, reachin up, reachin over
I feel a breeze cover me called Jehovah
And daddy I’m on my way
Cause I was made to love…

I was made to love you
I was made to find you
I was made just for you
Made to adore you
I was made to love
And be loved by you
You were here before me
You were waiting on me
And you saïd you’d keep me

Anything, i would give up for you

Everything, I’d give it all away

i can’t help it if i don’t feel it sometimes, (that’s why it shouldn’t be on feelings alone). sorry if i ignore You.

Gosh, i need to sleep.

-5.01 a.m.-

What, it’s already November now?

I just want to rant cos i’ve spend almost every single waking moment of this past week doing that mind-taxing sociolinguistic assignment… AAAHHHhhh!!!

and I’d just emailed it in…so It’s OVER!  OVER! OVER! AHHhhhh!!! =D

and i’m dead tired…

Last week went by so quickly, too quickly.. i can’t believe how quickly it went past..sigh.

thankfully i managed to return to ’study’ mode.

This past two weeks have been like Northpole and Southpole..

but i was just so HAPPY last week!!! =)

(but i’ll be happier after i submitted the last assignment next Thursday).

looks like my life revolves around studies again =)

oh, 2 days ago my house & my room became somekind of a show house. phew! Luckily I managed 2 scrub my toilets d day b4 if not…(=.=)” (not that it’s dat dirty, but still..)

Arghh, it’s almost d end of the semester. while other uni is having exams or had finished their exams, macquarie uni ppl r still preparing 4 their exams…

i don’t want 2 think about exams..yet..not 2nite at least ;p

sigh. i should take a break from d laptop.

sigh, it’s amazing how we can always stay awake going online yet can barely keep our eyes open to do assignments. Therefore, this post is just to keep me awake awhile more, in hope of continuing my assignment after this…

So what if I am doing rote learning, studying only for exams, and putting more emphasize on marks & grades rather than deep knowledge, etc…I really don’t care. It’s the main reason that keep me going. or else, can someone actually tell me what’s the reason i’m studying sociolinguistics & educational assessment??? Inner fulfilment? yeah, right.. I really don’t see the point, at all, or maybe, why do i need to see the point? just continue doing and be done with it. It’ll be over soon with the end of the semester. I just want to get good grades, learning is unrelated =p …or most likely to be

“Hey, Watanabe, can you explain the difference between the English subjunctive present and the subjuctive past?”

“I think I can”

“Let me ask you, then, what purpose does stuff like that serve in daily life?”

“None at all”. “It may not serve any concrete purpose, but it does give you some kind of training to help you grasp things in general more systematically.”

  Taken from Norwegian Wood by Haruki Murakami 

Last holidays I participated as a pilgrim for WOrld Youth Day where the Pope came to Sydney..It was really2 amazing! The whole Sydney city became a cathechesis site for that whole week (WYD was from 15-20 July).

Imagine everywhere you see, literary, it’s fellow Catholics from all around the world, many proudly en-caped in their country’s flag. We were all easily identified by our bright red-and-yellow tadika-like bagpacks. There were people from every known and unknown country..(my geography is bad, haha). I even get to bum into people from my church in KL.

One of the events was Asian Youth Gathering where almost every country from Asia perform their traditional dance. Guess what Malaysia performed? Tarian Sumazau..hehe. And it’s the first time I saw people from Myanmar, Bangladesh, Nepal who are not buruh kasar from Malaysia (no offense meant). Their traditional dances are really cute! I enjoyed this concert more than the opening concert of WYD where Guy Sebastian, Qantas Girls Choir, etc. was performing.

Other Major Events were Stations of the Cross (covering the whole city) , Pilgrim walk (where we walked around 12km, carrying our paraphernalia - sleeping bags and all,etc). They closed the entire Harbour Bridge on Saturday for this event alone), Opening Mass Papal Mass,Final Mass and the Saturday Night Vigil - where the 500 000 of us slept under the stars in the freezing cold winter of Sydney’s weather at Randwick Racecourse. And imagine distributing the Body of Christ to 500 000 people who attended. The Papal Arrival was also really awesome. People were climbing on top of each other or on any higher grounds (platform, railings, garbage bins (till they are all dented)) just to get a better glimpse of Pope Benedict. It was like people were trying to see Jesus Himself?! But it was a really touching moment for me T-T

The WYD consists of Cathechesis classes in the morning and Youth Festivals (expo, concert, performance, talks, plays, dramas, exhibitions, etc.) in the afternoon and night at various locations in the City. just choose whichever one you want to attend. One of the event I attended were the Inter-Faith Dialogue - where they have representatives from the Catholic, Jewish, Muslim and Hindu faith. It was really amazing to see how they held the talk..since I never get to attend one in Malaysia, if ever there is one. The main guest speaker was Archbishop Michael Fitzgerald. The dialogue got interstingly steamy during the Q&A session. Issues raised by the audience and the replying words that came out of the Archbishop made so much sense to me i wish at that time I have more cognitive ability to digest and retain it for future reference. I really have great respect and admiration for him.
 
Then there was Christopher West’s talk based on Pope John Paul II’s Theology of the Body: Pornography. He mentioned the two influential person that revolutionised the way the world view pornography at around the same time in 1960s? One was the founder of the Playboy magazine, Hugh Hefner, and two was Pope John Paul II in his work entitled Theology of the Body. One particular story I remembered from the talk was when he told what happened during a dinner with his wife at a restaurant. (It goes something along this line):

He: Honey, I’ve been thinking..Do you notice that something has changed in our relationship? After all this while, I realised that..all along..you can never fully satisfy me.

(*Gasp!)

She: You know what honey? I realised the exact same thing as well! I can never get full satisfaction from you.

(*double gasp!)

And then everyone at the restaurant when quiet.., waiting any minute now that they are going to declare a divorce..any minute now..

And yet they just give each other a kiss and continue eating. And they grow to love each other more than ever despite and because of that realization..It was because when you realise that, that you won’t demand this and that out of your relationship. You won’t become a nit-picker as most of us often do, where  you can always find every smallest mistake that your partner make and demand everything back in return. Am I making any sense here? And It’s because only in God alone that you can achieve full satisfaction. And you’ll find God in others. I think some of his talks can be downloaded

As a registered Pilgrim, we get travel passes and food for the whole week. As there were hundred over thousands of us, few more thousands were involved as volunteers and staffs for food distribution, security, road guides people, etc. So it was really one massive event.The Sydney’s public transport was in full use that week because many major roads were closed for us to walk about in the city. Really, everywhere in the city, we’re there.  The Sydney’s government had to amend the public transport and modify various places in the city to accommodate us . I never walked so much in my entire life as compared to that during the WYD week..Phew!

All in all, it was one very inspiring & fulflling experience. I also get to make new friends along the way. Just wish I brought some pins/badges from Malaysia to trade with other people there. They were like having collections of pins from around the world by the end of it! You may disagree with me but I think the event was much more effective than any United Nation Conference. Everyone was so friendly and warm towards each other as if we have always known one another. It’s like you get a glimpse of world peace? and I’m not exaggerating.. Really mengharukan la..

Wish you all can experience any future WYD as well. Even just to be present as a spectator, you’ll catch the enthusiasm. All of the event are free except for the catechesis anyway. And, as announced by Pope Benedict (Benedicto!!! clap! clap! clap! clap! clap!) after the final mass, the next WYD in 2011 will be in Madrid ;p hehe

Sigh..there’s more to this but i better stop here. Please excuse any grammar, spelling mistakes.

Photos will be uploaded some time dunno when.

4.20 a.m.